Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Boyfriend Tested Negative

Well My Boyfriend got his Test results today.

He tested Negative.

I was shocked. We both expected him to be positive.

He and I have been together for 5 years. We have been having unprotected sex for the majority of that time.

We or should I say I, thought that he was the person who brought this home. Now I feel horrible. I mean, he DID cheat. But heisnt the reason for this.

I stand by everything I have said. I havent cheated, done drugs or anything else that could have put me at risk in the time he and I have been together.

That would put me at getting HIV either 5 years ago, or from a dentist or surgeon. We just dont know. I guess we never will.

I prayed for him to be negative. I hoped against all odds that he would be negative. I got my wish!

BUT, Now im terrified.

We had both accepted the fact that we both had it since I had tested possitive. I guess I felt better knowing i wouldnt go through this alone. Now though, I feel more alone than ever. I know how selfish that must sound. I dont mean forit to be. I would never wish this on him.

THe Nurse at the testing center said that it was very rare for this to happen. We have both decided to be tested again.

Me on Tuesday and him 4 weeks from now.

I am so confused. I dont really know what to think.

COuld I actually be negative? Could he really be positive?

We dont know for sure.
I guess you never know anything for sure.

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